10 days and counting...

So I guess it is apparent that I am no longer working and trying to get everything situated at home before my big surgery.  Nothing like blogging a lot in the last few weeks to give a hint that something is different. :-)

Ten days.  That is nothing.  As a kid, when Christmas was in ten days I was going crazy with excitement--heck, even now when the excitement is mixed with anxiety over getting everything done, ten days is still really close. I can't even imagine how the parents must be feeling right now.  They had a big shower at work a few days ago and were able to experience one more part of becoming parents...and had a car stuffed full to show for it.  The diapers and formula are stocked.  The cribs and toys are ready to go.  The closet is overflowing with matching clothes...now they just need their babies!!! 

Just a few more days until my pre-op appointment at the hospital. Then I guess the real details start coming at me.  I am great at growing babies and even recovering from child birth...and as much as I am fine with the c-section, the fear of the unknown is still there.  I am hoping with such an easy pregnancy that my body will be in an ideal condition to recover.  I haven't had any issues with high blood pressure or too much weight gain and I know that will be a plus over the next few weeks.

My biggest concern is how things will go at home. I plan to take it easy, very easy, but that is hard when you want to get up and help your kids or your spouse.  It is hard to just sit around and let the household function around you.  So I find myself reading lots of post c-section comments on websites and when I can begin exercising without worry of causing problems with the incision.  I tend to research things well beyond necessity and that hasn't changed now.

Ten days.  My journey will be over and a whole new one will begin for these two little boys.  One child that is very mellow and has always behaved well for heartbeat checks, ultrasounds and non-stress tests...and another that is always wiggly with his hands up near his head (causing the smallest little bump that is almost always visible on the upper right of my belly).  I will miss them in a way, but also know I will feel the same sense of relief that came with my last surrogacy. I've done my part.  I did what was promised to the best of my ability. Knowing you have taken that tiny little frozen embryo and done exactly what you had hoped and prayed for--grown it into the child that two people have always wanted--comes with a huge array of emotions.  In ten days life will be different for all of us.  You can't go through this process and not be changed in some way. 

On a fun note, a great friend at work has started her own surrogacy journey!! Injections are still in the single digits as she starts her medical protocol.  It has been a long process for her already but I am so thankful that she has chosen this path too.  I know I can't physically help everyone that needs a baby and at some point my family deserves to have all of me back, but thinking that I have influenced others to pursue surrogacy rivals the feeling of seeing a newborn with her parents.